The Meaning Is You
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The Meaning Is You

The Journey*

Some would say that it is the hypnotist's voice, and others say that it's the choice of words, while still others say that it is your mind that creates a quiet meditative state with thoughts and images.

So, sit back comfortably, with your feet flat on the ground and your head straight up. Gently place your hands on your lap facing down. Let yourself relax and feel the comfortable.

Together, we are going to take three slow deep breaths. Listen very closely to the sound of your breath as you inhale and exhale. Feel yourself relaxing with each breath. Begin by breathing in slowly. Stop as soon you are comfortable with the amount of air you breathe in. Now, just as slowly, let it out. And breathe in again., and then out. And one more time slowly, in. and out.

Feel the warm relaxing sensation from the tip of your toes, through your legs to your abdomen, to your chest and shoulders, to your neck and on to the top of your head.

There is no hurry. Let everything go except what you are doing at this moment.

Now you are ready for your journey. Picture in your mind; you are standing on a path that leads to a garden. You walk a short distance to the top of a flight of stairs. There are 10 steps down to a very peaceful garden. On your right you see a pond with ducks and water fowl playing in and out of the reeds and rushes. On the left another pond and a park bench where you can sit and watch the warm, light breeze ripple the surface of the water.

You place your right hand on the hand rail, and slowly step down on the first step, then second each step you take relaxes more and more. You count the steps down 10., 9., 8., each step relaxes you more and more, 7., 6., 5., you feel more and more relaxed, 4., 3., 2., so relaxed now, 1., so calm.

You walk slowly over to the park bench enjoying the warmth of the sun on your skin, the sounds of birds singing, the sounds of the water on the pond lapping against the shore. You slowly lower yourself to the park bench, and sit there quietly for a moment absorbing the peaceful movements around you. (Sit quietly for a moment)

In your mind, you begin to appreciate what life has meant to you. You begin to realize that this peace, this content that you feel is what your life is all about. Your life experience has prepared you to handle whatever experiences come your way. You are contented with the skills you have acquired and how easily they come to you when you need them. You can take this content with you wherever your experiences take you. And you realize that you can always return to this place whenever you wish, whenever you need to refresh your mind, to enjoy the peaceful feelings, just by taking this short journey over again.

You get up from the park bench and walk to the stairs. Without looking back your start to climb back up counting each stair from 1., 2., 3.., now start count faster 4, 5, 6, 7, and faster still, 8, 9, 10, quickly bring yourself back to full wakefulness. You stretch a little, as though you have awakened from a restful nap. You feel good about yourself; you are contented and ready for whatever life brings you.

*Do not read this while performing other tasks, such as driving, that require your full attention.

Thoughts In Technicolor

Thoughts are not a thing nor are they fact.

A thing  is an object that one need not, cannot, or does not wish to give a specific name to: "that metal thing"; "things I'd like to buy".

You cannot take a thought out to measure, weigh or touch it. It is not a thing. A thought is a series of electrical impulses in your mind. When you focus on something, the thoughts relate to that thing. When you allow random thoughts to come into your mind, a lot of thoughts are just random pulses.

Thoughts impact you as a person depending on whether you accept them as truths or believe in their importance. Thoughts are tools to help you understand yourself in relation to how you see the world. Thoughts are not laws, not rules, just your opinion, your interpretation of how you interact with the world.

Your mind is your private place where you paint the colors of the world as you wish to see them. Your are an artist when it comes to choosing how you want to see the world. Your fears, your weaknesses, your strengths, your beliefs, your thoughts make the world mean what you expect it to mean.

Your are intellectual, emotional, spiritual, physical all at once. You cannot stop any of these things from being and influencing your mind or your thoughts. You may wish to be more objective, but you still have those qualities acting all at the same time.

Being objective or subjective is just a philosophical thought. Nice to think about them as being separate from each other, but in reality, never apart. Subjective and objective are philosophical ideals. Just some words that were invented to focus our minds on ideas, to relate to us the ideal of being.

I recently read an article that purported to show that thoughts were things. Not once did that article define thing as being an object.

Another article asked you to 'think with your heart', which is to say that don't think, just act impulsively.  According to that article, the expression "think with your heart" came from ancient times when it was believed that we thought with our heart instead of our mind. So to think with your heart is equivalent to saying the earth is flat.

No matter what happens to you, you are totally capable of thinking the thoughts you want. People live with tinnitus, a constant ringing in their ears caused by damage to the inner ear. How? By focusing on what they choose to do and think. You direct the focus where you want it. If you want to be driven crazy ,focus on the noise, real or imagined.

If you want to live life fully focus on thoughts of your choice. Thoughts are neither facts nor things. They are tools to understanding if you allow yourself to look at things and events from different points of view.

How Do I Change?

Wanting to change is the starting point.

First you must understand and accept that you want to change. You must understand and accept full responsibility for what you want to change. No one can change you unless you are prepared to accept change.

1. Identify what it is you want to change. Change comes about as a result of insight. That ah-ha moment when you recognize that something has changed in your thinking to make you see yourself in a different light or from a different point of view.

2. Examine your opinions about that which you want to change. This requires you to mentally examine your opinions and beliefs. Our opinions are just thoughts that we accept as true. An opinion is nothing more than accepting what we believe based on what we assume is true. Opinions are often a mask to cover our feelings of fear and inadequacy.

3. Look at the thing you want to change from different points of view. People have different opinions and beliefs because they see the world from within their own minds. The world as they see it is different from the world as you see it. Even a close friend, relative or spouse sees the world from a different perspective. There is no one unique point of view. So don't be afraid to examine your beliefs and opinions.

4. When you are using your mind in this way you are using it as a tool. Your mind is a tool. You misuse it when you fret about something. When your worry about 'what if's' or regret 'should haves'. Focusing your mind on constructive projects, like changing some behavior in yourself, is using your mind for what it was intended. It is a tool.

5. After all, you choose to change and you choose what you want to change to. Choosing another point of view gives you control over yourself. And that is true very every person in you life. You cannot force others to think like you do. Their mind view of the world is not your mind view of the world. So choose a point of view that you are comfortable with that is different from you current point of view. Then everything will change in step with your new beliefs.

This requires you to do some careful mental self examination. This is where change begins. This shows that you are an adult and are ready to accept responsibility for your thoughts, words and actions.

This requires you to think about what you assume is true and real and what you know is real. A tree is real. How you picture it in your mind is just a memory of a tree. If you want to discover trees, you have to see the trees before you and examine each in detail.

I have known people to never allow themselves to review of their own thoughts and opinions. They cannot accept other peoples' interpretation of events. Only their opinion matters, and if you do not agree then you are their enemy.

I once had a neighbor ask me if my dogs were from the same litter.  One was a pure black cocker-spaniel and the other a grey shitsu-poodle mix. The cocker-spaniel had curly hair, a cropped tail and stood a full head above the shi-poo which had straight hair and a bushy tail.

I quickly realized that his internal image of a dog was just that, a dog was a a dog. He had never focused on the differences in breeds.

I once studied art from a book by Betty Edwards. In it she shows that some people never get passed how they learned to draw in grade school. Their idea of drawing a person is still a stick diagram.  In her book,  she shows how anyone who studies her system can upgrade their internal image of how to draw a person. It is a mental process of studying people in detail and updating how you see.

For years I tried to overcome my shyness so that I would feel in control when I sang before an audience. I've tried many techniques and recently tried self-hypnosis and reverse film techniques. These have been quite successful. So when I am preparing to sing on stage, I now only need to say to myself "You are a professional. You can do this. "  While I have not eliminated all the feelings I have, I do feel much more calm and in control in front of an audience. I also think appearing before an audience as often as I can has also helped.

The reverse film technique simply requires you to feel everything from start to finish of an episode when you start to feel shy and self-conscious, but to imagine it as a film running in reverse from when you feel shy to when the beginning just before you started to feel that way. Do it several times. This has the effect of "spoiling" your memory of the event.

You are the master of change in yourself. You can change, but only can choose. It may take time, and it may require much thinking and self-discipline, but you can change if you choose.

Understanding - The Power of Your Thoughts

The single most important thing is Understanding. I learned this from many people both from books and conversations.

There is no secret Understanding that you don’t already know. You are just not yet aware that you know it. Many of the popular psychology writers provide similar information in a more or less direct fashion. I hope that this article helps you become aware and make use of what you know.

Sidney Banks explained the Three Principles that govern how we interact with our environment.

The first Principle is Mind, the life force that ...

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Just As I Thought

Our brain is as unique to each of us as a fingerprint and our perception of the world is just as unique. We build our idea of the world thought by thought in the privacy of our mind.

From the time we take our first breath through every moment of our lives, our minds are generating thoughts. Our minds become a tool when we focus on being in balance, on our environment, or working on a specific task.

Balance is achieved when we are aware of ourselves as a single being, not separate physical, spiritual, emotional and rational parts and when we are focused in the moment.

When we are not focusing our attention on something specific, our minds continue to generate random thoughts based on our interpretation of previous experiences, emotions and fears.

Thoughts connect us to our world. You connect to the world with your eyes and ears to gather information, but it is your thoughts that help you understand and make meaning. Thoughts are not a perfect tool. We colour the new information with our interpretation of the past.

Whenever something is happening before your eyes, you try to understand it with your thoughts. You focus your attention and your thoughts on what is happening and as result you respond with emotions, then take the necessary action.

Feelings, or emotions, are a response to your thoughts. Without thought, your life would have no meaning and no feelings. So how you think makes a difference to how you feel.

Thoughts are Our Experience

Thoughts are your interpretation of your experiences. Thoughts include both words and images.

Memories are thoughts of past events.

Imagination is the use of thought to create unreal experiences, like daydreams and what if scenarios, within your mind.

While you sleep your mind is unfocused. This allows random thoughts to flow into your mind. The dreams and  night mares are the result of random thoughts in a sleeping, unfocused mind.

Beliefs are thoughts you accept as true without proof. Beliefs are thoughts to which you are attached. All your thoughts are measured against your beliefs.

While experiencing the world, we form rules in our minds about how we want to interpret the information we are getting. These become our beliefs and expectations about how the world should behave when we are present. Beliefs are what we expect of the world. We may believe those rules are logical and right, even though others may have different rules that they believe are logical and right.

These rules are how we explain the behaviour of the world to ourselves and how we explain our behaviour to the world. When we encounter something new we search our minds for a similar event and evaluate it according to our existing rules. Often we may overlook differences and miss an opportunity to learn something new.

While we are children, our parents and adult guardians greatly influence the rules that we make to interpret the world. But, once we are old enough, we begin to rebel against those influences and start to make our own rules, sometimes keeping the rules our parents offered and sometimes totally rejecting them.

We can focus our minds anywhere within our mind, body or environment. If we focus on our feelings of fear, our minds can generate thoughts to explain and confirm those fears.

Our minds are never idle. If your mind is not focused on a task, random thoughts tend to flow in to keep the mind busy.

As we sit idle during the day, daydreams occur. Our mind continues to work by sending us random thoughts from weird associations of words and images. If we focus on them, they seem to become real. If we believe them, if we believe that they are offering true meaning then the fears and emotions we feel, can become our focus.

On the other hand if we allow random thoughts to enter our minds and we believe we need to try to follow each and every changing thought, to act on every thought, we can become totally unfocused and not know where to turn our minds.

Our thoughts of the world around us can lead to frustration, anxiety and stress, as we imagine the world is not living up to our expectations. Left too long stress and anxiety can lead to depression and a sense of not being able to cope with what is happening in life.

If we believe that we are our thoughts and not separate conscious beings, we become protective of our thoughts, beliefs, and rules as though they were real.

During the night as we sleep our minds continue to work. Random thoughts generate dreams. Our minds continue to try to make sense of these thoughts by making a story of them. Some dreams are pleasant, others, nightmares.

To find peace and calm within ourselves we need to focus on a balance within ourselves and to focus on our surroundings.

If we focus on what our minds are producing randomly or on resulting feelings, then we become disconnected from our relationships, our surroundings and ourselves.

Sydney Banks Three Principles Psychology

Sydney Banks wrote one of the most all-encompassing models of psychology.

I recently read his Three Principles Psychology.

Banks three principles are Mind, Consciousness and Thought.

Mind is the Life energy that enables our existence, our Consciousness.

Consciousness is being Aware of our life form, our existence, our ability to think and our ability to feel.

Thought is the mind activity that permits us to interpret our world, our reality. We create our reality of the world with our thoughts. Our Thoughts create whatever we imagine; what if scenarios, fear, anxiety, stress and we believe it is real.

All thoughts, and all human activities, result in feelings. Thoughts are a reaction to our environment, our experiences and our memories. A thought isn't real; it's just in your mind, yet it allows us to create our own reality.

Through Understanding these Three Principles, how they determine our lives, we become peaceful and calm.

Only with personal insight do we gain Understanding. Our thoughts create our meaning of world. We, each of us, create our own personal world.

While you can guide a person along the path to understanding, only they can come to an insight in the private place that is their mind.

Your mind is a tool.

You can direct it and focus it on solving your problems, on what you are doing and thinking in the moment.

You can never be not thinking. Left unfocused your mind fills with random thoughts. Thoughts create feelings. Disastrous thoughts create disastrous feelings.

We all get random thoughts. A thought is just a thought. You do not need to do anything about a thought. You do not need to take it seriously or do anything about it. You just focus on what you are doing.

If you start to believe that those random thoughts are real, instead of just memories of past experiences or imagined what ifs, you can start to feel anxiety, depression, sadness and soon your thinking is out of control.

You can control your thoughts by directing your mind to take a different perspective on your experiences and beliefs. You can control your thoughts by focusing on what you are doing in the moment.

Sometimes, just realizing that you have a choice as to how you can react to a situation will change your whole outlook. Sometimes, just changing your point of view, trying to see it through someone else’s  eyes, will produce enough change to bring you that insight.

Life is a journey best lived in the moment. The past is what we remember of our experiences. It is no longer real. The future is what we imagine will happen. It is not yet real. The only time we have in real time is now, this moment.

Meditation is Easy

Meditation is just quiet time and relaxation practice.

Here is a simple method:
Sit in a quiet comfortable place.
Breathe slowly in and slowly out.
Focus on the sound or feel of your breath.
If your mind wanders, just bring it back to the sound or feel of your breath.

You can do this anywhere. Do it for three breaths or one thousand.

This exercise worked frequently will help you to practice focusing moment to moment while giving you a time to keep your mind busy on something else.  Joy and confidence come from feeling peaceful and calm in our selves.

Whose Memories Are Right?

Every child in a family remembers things differently. Every human being has a different perspective.

Simply because you are in the middle of things as they happen does not mean that everyone will tell the same story as you tell yourself. Each person will have their own unique perception of what happened, how things unfolded, how things affected them, how they tell the story to themselves, how they explain to others.

Everyone’s perception of events is right from their perspective, because that is what they have experienced through their thoughts and feelings.

You can tell others the story from your perspective, but you will never change their perception of reality.

"Accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Breathe in deeply of life. Be grateful that that you were allowed to experience life.

Change Your Thoughts.

Change begins at the individual level. It can only be personal. A person will not change unless they choose to change. You cannot change another human being until they are prepared to change. Each of us has the power to shape our own world, the world we think in.

Being philosophical about life means that you reflect on the meaning you give experiences. You accept that life just is what it is. You realize that how you think about something creates the feelings you have. The same experience can result in different feelings, both positive and negative, but also in simple neutral acceptance.

Life is not out to get you. Life is just the flow of experiences that happen to you, both good and bad. How you think about those experiences and what's important to you in those experiences and where you direct your thoughts in remembering those experiences can change how you feel about life right in this moment.

For example, if you were involved in a serious car accident that left you with scars and damaged your legs so that you always limped, your outlook on life could be either negative or positive. You could feel sorry for yourself to the point of not wanting to do anything or you could pick yourself up and expect everything to go on or be better than before. You could go out and counsel others on the dangers of poor driving; you could help those who have suffered more than you.

There are as many attitudes to life experiences as there are people. Your brain is as totally unique to you as is your outlook on life. Your mind is your private world. Your thoughts are your connection to life. No thoughts, no meaningful life.

This stresses how important thinking about how you think is to leading a peaceful and joyful life. You cannot bring feelings into your life without thinking. You respond to everything that happens to you with thoughts. How you respond in your thoughts to what life throws at you determines how well you feel.

How you respond in your thoughts to what life throws at you determines how well you feel. The question is what do you believe should happen and is that a valid expectation or just a make believe rule? And, if it is just a belief you have, then why are you letting it make you feel bad?

Take complete responsibility for all your thoughts and  actions. You have free will. Others are not annoying unless you let them annoy. It is just how you choose to think about them and their actions.

It’s not the experiences you went through that determine how you feel. It is how you think about them.

You can choose to spend all your life thinking about the experiences you had, being bitter and regretting your past. Or you can focus your thoughts on what you are doing moment to moment, right now, to make a better life for yourself.

Only your thinking can bring joy into your life. So focus on what you are doing now and enjoy the moment. And, soon enough you will have a whole series of joyful moments to look back on!

If you believe that you can get over your painful experiences, then you will.

What is it you believe should happen? Is there a different approach to how you see your thoughts that will make you feel better?

Beliefs aren’t bad in themselves. They help you to make decisions about and to understand of life from your perspective.

A belief is not useful if it condemns you to reliving painful memories or feeling bad about yourself. A belief is just a thought. It isn’t real or cast in stone. You can change your mind.

Then take the steps toward your life goals, moment-by-moment, day-by-day. That is all we can expect of ourselves.

Finding Peace And Calm

Life is a journey best lived in the moment. The past is what we remember of our experiences. It is no longer real. The future is what we imagine will happen. It is not yet real. The only time we have in real time is now, this moment.

Our brain is as unique to each of us as a fingerprint. Our perception of the world is unique. We build our idea of the world thought by thought in the privacy of our mind.

From the time we are born to each moment in life we ...

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Joy Is A Thought

Sure, you connect to the world with your eyes and ears, but it is your thoughts that give everything meaning. Without thought, your life would have no meaning and no feelings.

So how you think makes a difference to how you feel. Thoughts create meaning,  and as a result, feelings.

Your mind is a tool. You can direct it and focus it on solving your problems, on what you are doing and thinking in the moment. When you are not using your mind as a tool or focusing on something you are doing then random ...

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Thinking About Thoughts (A continuation)

Your thoughts are the answer to everything you experience.

How you respond in your thoughts to what life throws at you determines how well you feel.

This rule is true for all human beings....

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Thoughts – The Answer To Everything

You respond to everything that happens to you with thoughts.

As you progess from childhood on, you make up rules, beliefs and expectations about the events, experiences, and circumstances to understand what is happening. You believe that theses circumstances are happening to you because you are present.

You interpret these as your experiences in life....

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What if it's not true?

I've been curious about the workings of the mind since I discovered psychology at the age of 14. I've read many books on that subject including Freud, Jung, Adler, and many of the popular self-help books including "I'm Ok, You're OK", Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP), Tony Robbins, Eckhart Tolle. I have several shelves full of books.

My first insight into how the mind works and how it is the source of what we understand and believe was when I read NLP. NLP talks about being programmed by the adults that surround us while from our blank state ...

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